Sunday, October 2, 2011

My mind is full

So I'm gonna spill it.

I have many urges these days.
The spending money urge has come and I haven't quite shaken it even though we don't have an excess of dough. or any dough for that matter. I have gone back to the budget it's needed these days. I hope we make it to Friday.
The urge to take advantage that we aren't pregnant so the need to drink, go on a cruise, and go to Vegas again. I am ready to go Now. Then that Stupid angel on the other shoulder is still saying you didn't save up for this, but I still wanna break that rule and do it.

Friends.... When Kim had Aiden she got and is very busy now. I went from talking to her twice a day to never, to twice a week. Life was/is since that happened, my other friend's that have had babies I never call because I know they are as busy as Kim is... probably not what I should be doing, I should still call and keep in touch, at least leave a message. Or invite them over and put the dogs in the garage with crates. But do I do this? No. So Goal: work on this! Same goes for Jaimie we use to work opposite schedules so my normal phone call at 7am won't work for her, so I just don't call at all. I think of all these people often but I never call. They probably just think I don't care.

Pictures, I never take them anymore. Guitar, ready to start again but scared to make the commitment to leave school at a normal time.

Remember when I got together at Christmas with the MMP played the guitar, had a few adult beverages, thought about Rod....I feel like I need another one of those. Not 'cause of Rod just like, other stuff.

This new format reminded me....just the other day we were sitting around saying I was really stressed last school year. Then I couldn't remember why? oh yea, Rod I remembered that but Behr being sick was really hard. I was up in the middle of the night fretting about him. Then the father of year said just put him down. Thanks, remind me not to tell you things.

I told Jennifer I missed her the other night when I spoke to her. I miss all MMP I wish they all lived here and my BFF pool was always available.


Oh a positive note, I love 2nd graders and my classroom is running smoothly.
...okay that's all for now.
It's a school night and I gotta stop thinking and go to bed. XO