Wednesday, January 16, 2013


Talk about a low...I feel like I'm on Mars in the worlds largest canyon. (Can you tell we are studying planets?)

For so long...well like a month. I've been okay. It seems like everything is going wrong this week. Sitting here crying. I don't want to go to work. I wanna lay around. A fellow blogger posted this song, and I am now obsessed with it.

Each night we share our high and low from the day. Well Will has gone to bed, he doesn't feel well. What would I say today?

It would be a real stretch to turn anything positive. So in my negative, passive aggressive, awful mood here I go...sarcastically.

--that a friend said she'd pick me up from the mechanic in the morning.
--I began my day clueless of the pregnancy news I'd get from others.
--The rodent man will show up Monday to set bait traps to get rid of whatever is under our house.
--I found a new website that I love:
--Someone complimented my new haircut...because it must be easier with a baby.

But truthfully, I have been feeling so guilty for terminating my pregnancy. I know deep down that I would rather suffer than to bring Stella here to suffer with us. I also know that I had two shitty choices to pick from, neither were good. But really, what if it happens again? What makes my body different this time? Nothing...I am doing all the same things.


  1. Love you whether you are down or up. I will pray that tomorrow will be a better day.

  2. Sending a long distance hug.
    Love you so much!
    People say I'm strong. People say you're strong.
    We're not strong all the time, are we?
    But right now... I'm having a strong (kind of) streak.
    So, I'm sending you love, energy and strength.
    If you can think of anything at all I can do to brighten even a sliver of your day please let me know.
    With all the love in the world,
    Jaimie Lee
    * * * * *

  3. I wish we could've talked longer yesterday. Love you & am thinking of you on both high & low days. Try to remember during the lows, there will be highs again. See you soon!